I'm being serious now. What's amiss up in my clock tower? Why am I only interested in men who are not interested in me in return? How is it that I seek these uninterested men out without realizing, and what is it about them that draws me so inexplicably to them?
Yes, yes, I know that it's no uncommon phenomenon that people are attracted to others who are not attracted back. And that this occurs millions of times a day to everyone. That doesn't make my lack of connections any less befuddling. By the age of 29 most people have fallen in love at least once. Most people have had a serious relationship involving living with someone with whom they're romantically ensconced.
Not I, said the fly.
99% of the men I've winked at or emailed on the match have either A) sent me a polite auto response denial B) looked at my profile and not bothered to respond at all C) responded only to flake or D) responded met up once and then disappeared off the face of the earth.
Only one has panned out, and he doesn't want a relationship. We're just working on being friends.
99% of the men who hit on me from the match (or in real life for that matter) are either A) boring morons B) have nothing in common with me C) no intelligent sense of humor or D) my dad's age
Now, I can't believe that I'm so fucking full of myself that I think I'm on some level way above my league. And I'm sick of hearing the "this town is ridiculously superficial" excuse because I'm not a huge ugly fat chic. Plus, I haven't lived in this town my whole life or anything.
There can really only be one logical explanation for this extreme unluckiness in love:
Reincarnation is real, and I was Napoleon in a previous life.
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