DilapiDate

So Match.com should really be called rejection.com. Being on one of these dating websites is worse than trying to make it as an actor. You've gotta have a strong constitution to get knocked down as much as you do in both scenarios. The similarity between the two is almost uncanny. Pour example:

Audition scenario:

Nationally syndicated Apple commercial, union, residual guarantees, possible launching pad for TV sitcom work or low brow comedies.

Date scenario:

5'11, dark hair, light eyes, one dimple, handsome, bearded, runs every morning, likes Vonnegut and Palahniuk but admits to perusing US Weekly when he's stuck working out in the gym. Great relationship with his family, has a creative job, enjoys board games, theme parties, and giving foot massages.

These, to me, are pretty equatable. (and fictitious) Both have the potential to change your life in wonderful ways. Both seem within the "realm of possibility" in, at least, my life. Preparation for the audition such a commercial and the first date with Quirky McDreamboat would be very similar. Lots of careful preparation would go into the grooming process. Hairs would be scraped off, plucked out, or coiffed. Facial enhancing paints would be applied to eyes, cheeks, and chin. Wardrobe would be meticulously planned out, tried on, worn around, put through possible positional scenarios, until just the right combination of unique, trendy, and feminine was achieved.

After said physical prep was complete, the mental psych up would begin. Deep breathing, brief mirror pep talk, and a mantra of "be yourself, be cool, be nice". Then you get in your car and go.

You present, you do your little song and dance, and usually come away feeling pretty confident and full of fizzy lifting drink. "That went well! I felt charming and sassy!" But then...nothing.

No call.

No txt.

Not interested. But without explanation either. And frustratingly of all...it's not that they weren't charmed, or amused, or even pleasantly surprised. It's just that there was something missing or someone a bit different or something easier. Someone they knew from a friend of a friend. Someone...else.

How do you stop yourself from obsessing over what it might have been that was not right, not enough about you for them. They seemed like enough to you. They held such promise. Gave you...the feelings. But nope, not this time. Maybe next time, yeah, next time. Next time it'll be the one. The big break. The big love.

Or not?